Emotional Attachments. Good or bad?

Gautama Buddha said that the root of suffering is attachment. To be free from sufferings, free yourself from attachments.

Practising non-attachment is tough. Yes it is not that easy to let go and requires a lot of will power and self-control. When all attachments fall away what remains is REALITY. In the process one may be vulnerable and get negatively influenced by destructive behaviors like drugs and alcohol abuse, anxiety, compromising, rushing into decisions, relationships, mood swings, distant behavior. Our competitive modern lifestyles making it worse, with over indulgence in digital platforms and social media and reduced human interactions it becomes tougher reaching out for emotional support in times of crisis..

One should learn the difference between attachment and connection. Connection gives you power, enriches you emotionally & as a person whereas attachment sucks the life out of you. The best way out is accepting whatever comes on the way and allowing it to leave when its time because you may not be able to control what life throws at you but you have a choice how to react to it. Slow down, take your time and think rationally if its worth a shot. What’s for you will be for you effortlessly! Be it people, relationships, beliefs, money or belongings.

How to get emotionally strong?

  1. Consider your past experiences and learn from them if required seek help from someone you can trust or a therapist.
  2. Channelize your energy into something productive, may be your interests or passion- Writing works for me!
  3. Focus and avoid distractions. This is the toughest part but not impossible!
  4. Learn to Say NO! If I have so can you.
  5. Stop over reacting. “Life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react to it.”
  6. Take good care of yourself. Workout, sleep & eat healthy.
  7. Surround your self with happy & positive people.
  8. Don’t waste time in unproductive things or with people who add no value to your life.
  9. Appreciate, empathize and help people around you.
  10. Last but not the least, Believe in yourself, Love yourself, Appreciate yourself for whatever you have accomplished and practice Gratitude.

How I finally did my First Solo backpacking trip!

Solo travelling, a distant thought which lead to confusion and fear. Scared at the thought of travelling to new places, ALONE. Is it safe for a solo woman traveller in India? Which place is safest to visit? What should I be careful about? These were the thoughts that were holding me back. I kept on reading blogs and searching online. Though I have been shifting to new places all alone since I was 5yrs but solo travelling for the first time was nerve wrecking.

After a long procrastination finally in Nov, 2018; after all the overthinking I said “Fuck it! has to be now or never” and I decided on Thailand, which means two-milestones at a time. First Solo trip and First International trip.

So I like unplanned, impromptu trips & I believe in “Living in the moment” just like life . Within a week I booked my flight tickets to and fro (yes I had overspent on lots of things which I don’t regret at all cause there were lots of learnings).

I had planned only for the 1st day at Bangkok else everything I decided as an when I arrived at different destinations. Walked like a crazy person all across exploring different cities, some times I hired a tuk-tuk and they are shit expensive if u cant bargain well, spent a lot of money in travelling but I also found a few honest local people. Hitch hiked when there was no transport available. Since I was staying in hostels, 24/7 departmental shops really acted as a boon for anything I wanted to buy, right from food to any necessity.

Though I avoided all sorts of intoxications ; ) & was very conscious of my surroundings. In case you are a lady planning a solo you need to be aware of your surroundings. I distinctly remember few proud moments when a customs official and few localities whom I had interacted literally applauded me and said that they haven’t really met a solo female traveller from India 🙂

P.S. People keep asking me how is to travel solo?

Solo travelling has been an enriching experience, interacting with new people, cultures, being self dependent, enjoying your own madness. It has been very liberating emotionally, a new country, different dialect, strangers all around, if you are in to any problem deal with it because you have no one to turn up to, no one to depend on, those weak moments when you feel like speaking to someone and the only person you have got is yourself, embracing yourself and falling in love with yourself all over again, doing crazy stuff, learning to enjoy your own company and be the source of your own happiness. I realized later that most of these emotions seemed familiar and was inculcated in me as a child having spent my life in boarding since I was a kid.